Company is a funny thing. Sometimes you crave it and other times you really really don't. Sometimes all you want is to be left alone to do your own thing in your own way at you own pace.
I have just shifted labs at my placement. I have gone from the biggest lab in the building, where we used a good three quarters of it to one maybe a quarter of the size. I had only just gotten used to where everything was: we moved there so our fume cupboard could be replaced, and now, having to find where everything is again and spending what feels like half my time apologising for getting in the way of the other people in the lab. Thing is, I hadn't realised just how much time I spent distancing myself from the rest of the lab: I would move to the furthest bench to do my work, and usually end up with my back to them all whilst I worked.
Thing is, in the new lab I physically can't. And I'm becoming more and more aware that I'm having to stop short of biting the heads off the other two placement students.
Don't get me wrong, I'm managing, most of the time, but sometimes it is hard. And when I'm not concentrating so hard that if I so much as think something else I'll lose count of the colonies on my plate and have to start again, I'm more than willing to interact with the others, help them out if they need it, and hold conversations with them (today it was history and the feasibility of empires)
How do teachers cope having to give all of their attention to twenty-five plus students at a time? I couldn't do it. I'm glad I recognise that now though, at one point I was thinking of going into teaching.
Why am I so antisocial at work? Maybe part of the reason is that we have moved and I'm having to re-adjust to where everything is and whats going on. Another part of it may well be that work has picked up and we're getting more jobs in more often now, and I'm more likely to be leaving at half five, six or even later than half two/ three o clock.
I think that the two have combined to feel like I've started a new job, and everything is all a little bit new and overwhelming again. Maybe when I've settled down in the lab I'm working in for the rest of the year it will get better.
And I'll stop being such a grumpy cow. And I'll not be so tired that I want to come in from work and curl up and sleep straight away, and actually be able to do something with my evenings.
I can always hope...
Realistically, work isn't so bad. I'm enjoying it, and my supervisor isn't constantly on my back about every little thing. I just didn't realise I was so set in my ways. And that changing them would be so hard.
This post has turned into one giant moan. but I'm thinking clearer and feel more relaxed, so it was a productive moan. And it is the weekend. and I'm running the first session of my game come Sunday. I'm certainly looking forward to that. Spirit of the Century is full of shiny win.
I'll leave you with the thought that I have just looked up and seen AIDS, Ebola virus and Algal Scum staring at me from the mantle piece. And I think Ebola just waved.
I have just shifted labs at my placement. I have gone from the biggest lab in the building, where we used a good three quarters of it to one maybe a quarter of the size. I had only just gotten used to where everything was: we moved there so our fume cupboard could be replaced, and now, having to find where everything is again and spending what feels like half my time apologising for getting in the way of the other people in the lab. Thing is, I hadn't realised just how much time I spent distancing myself from the rest of the lab: I would move to the furthest bench to do my work, and usually end up with my back to them all whilst I worked.
Thing is, in the new lab I physically can't. And I'm becoming more and more aware that I'm having to stop short of biting the heads off the other two placement students.
Don't get me wrong, I'm managing, most of the time, but sometimes it is hard. And when I'm not concentrating so hard that if I so much as think something else I'll lose count of the colonies on my plate and have to start again, I'm more than willing to interact with the others, help them out if they need it, and hold conversations with them (today it was history and the feasibility of empires)
How do teachers cope having to give all of their attention to twenty-five plus students at a time? I couldn't do it. I'm glad I recognise that now though, at one point I was thinking of going into teaching.
Why am I so antisocial at work? Maybe part of the reason is that we have moved and I'm having to re-adjust to where everything is and whats going on. Another part of it may well be that work has picked up and we're getting more jobs in more often now, and I'm more likely to be leaving at half five, six or even later than half two/ three o clock.
I think that the two have combined to feel like I've started a new job, and everything is all a little bit new and overwhelming again. Maybe when I've settled down in the lab I'm working in for the rest of the year it will get better.
And I'll stop being such a grumpy cow. And I'll not be so tired that I want to come in from work and curl up and sleep straight away, and actually be able to do something with my evenings.
I can always hope...
Realistically, work isn't so bad. I'm enjoying it, and my supervisor isn't constantly on my back about every little thing. I just didn't realise I was so set in my ways. And that changing them would be so hard.
This post has turned into one giant moan. but I'm thinking clearer and feel more relaxed, so it was a productive moan. And it is the weekend. and I'm running the first session of my game come Sunday. I'm certainly looking forward to that. Spirit of the Century is full of shiny win.
I'll leave you with the thought that I have just looked up and seen AIDS, Ebola virus and Algal Scum staring at me from the mantle piece. And I think Ebola just waved.
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