I do apologise. I had meant to post this in national sausage week. Last week in fact. but I managed to click save as draft rather than post. In my defense (is that s? I thought it was C.) I was rather tired at the time. so here it is. A week late but the 10 20 to sausageland has now arrived...
Have you had your sausages today? For today is national sausage week. Yes. show your support for sausages. Go out! Buy some! And eat them!
We have a lot of very strange festivals out there. Like Bonfire night. As was pointed out by a friend from Denmark today, we are basically celebrating a terrorist. although it is more, now I think of it about the fact that he failed at being a terrorist. And cheese rolling. thats odd. fun, but odd. And then there are the truly fringe ones, like international toilet day. And Welly boot week. now that one is odd. If I remember rightly, it's held in summer...
But truly. What a way to show your support for something you like. I like it therefore I shall eat it. What would happen if we approached everything we liked like that? What would life be like? What about if you had a passion for toxicology? And what about Mothering Sunday? Our mothers wouldn't last past our first birthday. We would all, excepting twins and some very fortunate circumstances be single children. And then, well, where would it end? Father's day? Birthdays? Barring the fact there wold be no humans in short order, we would be eligible as a species for a Darwin Award, I recon one of two things would happen:
1. We would all become Jehovah's Witnesses. Why? No birthdays. Therefore we would have more of a chance for survival.
2. The world would be a very different place.
Well, yes. Of course this last is true. But I think that polygamy would become commonplace. Well, that would make the Mormons happy. Except they wouldn't be Mormons. Or at least, a strange mixture of Mormonism and Jehovah's Witnesses would take over.
But some good would come of it: STIs would be a lot less common. Because, lets face it, girls would be a LOT more careful about things. Kids wouldn't be spoilt rotten, no mothers would mean they would have to do a lot more around the house. And, I suspect that there would be a lot more teachers; people who wanted children but didn't want to die. Also, The world wouldn't get overcrowded because cannibalism would be in full force. One born, one dies. More men than girls then.
This all sound like an horrific world. Not entirely sure it is one I would want to live in.
Remember: A sausage is for life. not just for national sausage week.
But don't let them go mouldy. That's just a waste.
Have you had your sausages today? For today is national sausage week. Yes. show your support for sausages. Go out! Buy some! And eat them!
We have a lot of very strange festivals out there. Like Bonfire night. As was pointed out by a friend from Denmark today, we are basically celebrating a terrorist. although it is more, now I think of it about the fact that he failed at being a terrorist. And cheese rolling. thats odd. fun, but odd. And then there are the truly fringe ones, like international toilet day. And Welly boot week. now that one is odd. If I remember rightly, it's held in summer...
But truly. What a way to show your support for something you like. I like it therefore I shall eat it. What would happen if we approached everything we liked like that? What would life be like? What about if you had a passion for toxicology? And what about Mothering Sunday? Our mothers wouldn't last past our first birthday. We would all, excepting twins and some very fortunate circumstances be single children. And then, well, where would it end? Father's day? Birthdays? Barring the fact there wold be no humans in short order, we would be eligible as a species for a Darwin Award, I recon one of two things would happen:
1. We would all become Jehovah's Witnesses. Why? No birthdays. Therefore we would have more of a chance for survival.
2. The world would be a very different place.
Well, yes. Of course this last is true. But I think that polygamy would become commonplace. Well, that would make the Mormons happy. Except they wouldn't be Mormons. Or at least, a strange mixture of Mormonism and Jehovah's Witnesses would take over.
But some good would come of it: STIs would be a lot less common. Because, lets face it, girls would be a LOT more careful about things. Kids wouldn't be spoilt rotten, no mothers would mean they would have to do a lot more around the house. And, I suspect that there would be a lot more teachers; people who wanted children but didn't want to die. Also, The world wouldn't get overcrowded because cannibalism would be in full force. One born, one dies. More men than girls then.
This all sound like an horrific world. Not entirely sure it is one I would want to live in.
Remember: A sausage is for life. not just for national sausage week.
But don't let them go mouldy. That's just a waste.
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